My long run was not going to happen. A 7:30am departure from my apartment Friday morning after a 30th birthday BASH this evening (it’s now Thursday, the day after Ran14milesafterwork) meant that Friday morning wasn’t looking promising. After a flight to Arizona and a rehearsal dinner that has an after party attached to it, Saturday morning looked
hungover not great. And then after the wedding of the year Saturday night, Sunday morning looked incapacitatedfromdancinganddrinking not too swell as well. When you added up all of the factors, it seemed Wednesday night was the only option. Insert trying to get out of the run panicked hysteria here. For years, long runs happen on Sunday or Saturday mornings. They have no place anywhere else on my color-coded GCalendar. NO OTHER PLACE. But somehow in my arguably OCD mind I had to deviate from my perceived (and color-coded, they have colors. colors.) long run ‘days’ and get this betch done Wednesday. Wednesday night. Who the fcurse runs a long run Wednesday night after work? #thiskid. So I of course begged whined and whimpered until the ever incredible GB decided he would join me for the first 6. That got me through 6 I knew I could do. But I just figured after 6 I’d end up finding some excuse and taking the subway home from central park where we were running. But that didn’t happen. Not even a little. I ended up with one of the strongest (mental) runs to date.
Jess (whose professional expertise I have enlisted after my injured abomination of a marathon in 2010) sent me a great article at the beginning of the week. I’ve been sick for awhile, which I think has been resolved, and running had frankly been miserable. I cut my 12 miler short to 11 miles (who does that) and was pretty much in a running funk of sorts.
So instead of being negative, I decided to be positive. Insert shock here. I decided to believe it would be a good run and focus on everything positive, and try not to think about anything negative the entire time. That lasted about three seconds, as we began my legs felt like lead, but I immediately pushed through those thoughts and tried to focus on every positive element humanly possible. It was a gorgeous night. I’m capable of running 14 miles. I had a great friend joining me for almost half of it. I live in Manhattan. The sun would be setting on the Hudson on my way home. Who doesn’t want to run from Tribeca to Central park instead of taking the subway??? You get the jist. Positive, positive, positive. And lo and behold, that sh*t werked. It really did. When I left Gregg in the park after 6 miles, I just took a deep breath, ate a few beans and headed back downtown. I told myself when I got to 10 miles I would only have 4 left and 4 is nothing. And then I continued to play mind games from there. I honestly surprised myself. I am an excellent run sabotager. Practically a professional. I can make any run not good enough, fast enough, long enough, someonecouldhaverunitbetter enough. ANY RUN. So this change in mentality was really everything.
So Wednesday, after work, I ran.
I ran all 14 of the 14 miles I needed to run. (9:15mm pace)
I ran faster in the end, and picked up the pace for the last three miles.
I ran for those who can’t run.
I ran for everything I’m so lucky to have.
I ran because I can, and if I can then I will.
And then the honest truth. I ran because there’s nothing good on TV anymore, so what else would I do?
And maybe I ran for this view. And for my city. And for Robinhood, because every day in our city people live in poverty right next to us, and they deserve our help and support.
How do you get past that mental barrier for things that are difficult for you?
And more importantly: if you watch TV, what do you WATCH? Because I just can’t with it. Maybe you can help me be cool and watch TV like everyone else.